FIRST, THE GOOD NEWS
YEAH, I KNOW, YOU'VE HAD PLENTY OF BAD NEWS LATELY
SO, GUESS WHAT? NO BAD NEWS TODAY!!!
YOUTUBE
"Camille and Kennerly ASL Our Lips Are Sealed"
There is no video here, guys. You dreamed this. The whole thing
Let's See If We Can Find Some More Good News, Right On Through New Years. THEN You Can Blow Your Brains Out! OK?
YAHOO NEWS
"Late workers, students get notes blaming NY subway"
Now, if they could just explain the smell of perfume and alcohol, when you get home late...
' People late for school or work because of New York City subway delays can get notes from the transit agency to give to their teachers or bosses. The New York City Transit division says it gives passengers the notes so they can prove they're not lying about being delayed while riding the subway. Passengers request the delay verification letters over the phone. NYC Transit verifies the date and time of the delay and sends an official note in the mail in one or two weeks. It mails 34,000 notes a year. Each letter shows the subway line taken and the durations of the trip and the delay. NYC Transit is working on an online system so it can accept Internet requests and e-mail the excuse letters. '
SPACE.COM
"Spectacular Sky Scene Monday Evening "
Clear skies, chance of UFO's, winds from the NE at 9mph, precipitation probability near zero, seasonable temperatures. Dress warmly and leave a note before you go.
' Every once in a while, something will appear in the night sky that will attract the attention of even those who normally don't bother looking up. It's likely to be that way on Monday evening, Dec. 1. A slender crescent moon, just 15-percent illuminated, will appear in very close proximity to the two brightest planets in our sky, Venus and Jupiter. People who are unaware or have no advance notice will almost certainly wonder, as they cast a casual glance toward the moon on that night, what those two "large silvery stars" happen to be? Sometimes, such an occasion brings with it a sudden spike of phone calls to local planetariums, weather offices and even police precincts. Not a few of these calls excitedly inquire about "the UFOs" that are hovering in the vicinity of our natural satellite. '
NY TIMES
"Study Suggests Some Cancers May Go Away"
See, I TOLD you not to scratch that!
' Cancer researchers have known for years that it was possible in rare cases for some cancers to go away on their own. There were occasional instances of melanomas and kidney cancers that just vanished. And neuroblastoma, a very rare childhood tumor, can go away without treatment. But these were mostly seen as oddities — an unusual pediatric cancer that might not bear on common cancers of adults, a smattering of case reports of spontaneous cures. And since almost every cancer that is detected is treated, it seemed impossible even to ask what would happen if cancers were left alone. Now, though, researchers say they have found a situation in Norway that has let them ask that question about breast cancer. And their new study, to be published Tuesday in The Archives of Internal Medicine, suggests that even invasive cancers may sometimes go away without treatment and in larger numbers than anyone ever believed. '
OTAGO DAILY TIMES, DUNEDIN, NZ
"Cat's healing powers leave patients 'feline' good"
And he takes Medicare & Medicaid.
' Jim turned up at the ward about four years ago and has been a ‘‘cat among the patients'' ever since, ward receptionist Ruth Blick said. ‘‘He is very good with patients who are unwell or unsettled,'' Miss Blick said. ‘‘He seems to know who needs attention and time.'' Instead of being frightened by distressed people, Jim seeks them out and calms them down, leaving them ‘‘feline'' good. It could be said Jim is a ‘‘purrfect'' companion. ‘‘He certainly seems to help patients in their recovery, or at least gives them some comfort.'' He now lives on the ward, sleeps on patients' beds and roams at large. Sam Shepherd, a patient at Isis, met Jim five weeks ago. ‘‘Sir James is a true gentleman,'' Mr Shepherd said. ‘‘He's fantastic to have around. ‘‘He's so in tune with people's moods and knows exactly what's required.'' '
YAHOO NEWS
"Car impounded after dog drives away from car wash"
The dog had a license, what's the problem?
' A dog waiting in a car while at a car wash slipped the vehicle into gear and drove in a loop before the car came to a stop. Pryor police officer Brent Crittenden said the dog's owner was washing the vehicle when the 70-pound pit bull jumped on the dash and somehow shifted the car into reverse. The car backed out of the car wash bay, continued onto a highway and then looped around before coming to a stop at an automated car wash lane. Crittenden said the vehicle was impounded because its owner was unable to provide proof of insurance. Because the dog was registered with the city, Crittenden said the owner was allowed to walk the pooch home. '
REUTERS
"9-year-old boy caught driving to grandma's house"
OK, this one didn't have a license. But he was a very courteous driver, unlike most adults.
' A 9-year-old boy was caught driving his parents' car alone after police received a report about an unmanned vehicle moving down the street. The boy took the car, which had been parked with the key in the ignition at his family's home in Gifu, central Japan, on Monday to visit his grandmother's house, a police spokesman said. "I learned from my father's driving and at game arcades," Kyodo News quoted the boy as telling police. The police received a call from a passer-by who reported having seen a driver-less car running down the street, as the boy was apparently too short to be seen from outside the vehicle, the spokesman said. The police found the car in a convenience store parking lot, after the pint-sized motorist had lost his way. They warned the boy's parents to keep a closer eye on their car, the spokesman added. '.
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Labels: Funny Stories, Glad Tidings, Good News, Happy Endings, Heartwarming Treacle, Season's Greetings
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