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Wednesday, September 22, 2004

ENUFF with the DEMOCRACY already!!!


The Justices picked us a perfectly good President just four years ago people! Come on, people, you know you'd rather have BBQ with this guy! What else is there? Anyway, the real Prez says all this voting and debating and flipflopping just weakens us! So cut it out!!! Suck it up! Look, just till all of our enemies have been defeated once and for all. The evildoers. The antichristians. The democrats.


OK, OK, how's this? We just give Dubya four more years, and if all the bad guys aren't gone by then, we try somebody else. Like Jeb. Or Marvin. Or some other Bush.

The economy? Hey, I'm doing great! I'm running guestworkers in and out of WalMart for $2/hr, and charging $5/hr, no bene's, no documentation, no questions asked! This economy is what you make of it! My glass is totally full! Of oil!!! Wahoo!!! $50 a barrel, Baby! Go Dubya, Go Dubya, Go Dubya!

I've also got money in rebreathers, new technology that will render so-called fresh air obsolete. You don't want your kids breathing lower-class kids' air, anyway, do ya? Some exciting opportunities in the Christian water industry, too. Can't talk about it right now, though. Send for a prospectus. (Damned bureaucrats!)

Hell, I'm just too damned busy for this democracy crap right now! Let's just let Bush & Cheney & Rumsfeld & Ashcroft run things for the duration, and thank God we don't have to think or worry or sacrifice anything for this kewl new kind of war. Unless you're stupid enough to join the Guard or the Reserve or the active duty military. Shit, even Dubya was smarter than that! Don't be like that idiot Kerry! He couldn't even get himself a cushy non-combat job in Vietnam! What a flipflopper!

Look, if Dubya loses a nuculer war with Iran or North Korea or whoever, then we vote! Until then, let's just can all this talk about democracy, hunh, people? Just till we're all safe again.

Now, go watch TV!

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2 Comments:

Blogger Rebma Esor said...

i am hoping that this is sarcasm...

5:06 PM, September 22, 2004  
Blogger Cosa Nostradamus said...

Nope. It was irony.

3:39 PM, September 23, 2004  

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