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Tuesday, December 14, 2004

"YOU GO TO WAR WITH THE ARMY YOU HAVE"


"NOT THE ARMY YOU MIGHT WANT"


"You Can Have All The Armor In The World On A Tank And A Tank Can Be Blown Up. And You Can Have An Up-Armored Humvee And It Can Be Blown Up."

--Secretary of Defense (for now), Donald F.U. Rumsfeld

Ahem.

My entry in the American Street Poetry Contest, based on Rumsfeld's latest brilliant quip:



sound off, one, two,

sound off, three, four,


i don't know but i been told

eskimo poontang's mighty cold

no one said that life was fair

so quit your whinin' over there


you go to war with the army you have

(us damned have-nots, 'specially)
not the army you wish you had

(an army of other guys, hopefully)

even a tank can get blown up

(an army no one wants to see)
in war there's never a guarantee

(why oh god does it gotta be me?)

hut-two-three-four
the army owns your ass for four
five-six-seven-eight

it's your recruiter you should hate

HOO-HAH!




You might remember the doo-wah-ditties from the movie "Stripes," with Bill Murray. Here's some actual "cadence-calls," marching-chants, Army songs:


JODY CHANT (SOUND OFF 2)


Am I right or wrong?

You right!

Am I right or wrong?

You right!

Am I right? You know I'm right

So tell me!

You right!


Jody was home when you left

When you left. Right!

Jody was home when you left

When you left. Right!

You had a good wife and you had a good home when you left! Right

But Jody was home when you left

When you left. Right!


Ain't no use in goin' home

Jody got yo' gal an gone

Am I right? You know I'm right

So tell me!

You right!


Every time you stamp yo' feet

Jody gets a piece of meat.

Am I right etc.


Ain't no use in goin' back

Jody got yo' Cadillac

Am I right etc.


Ain't no use in feelin' blue

Jody got your sister, too

Am I right etc.


Ain't no use to mourn an' grieve

Jody's gone, I do believe

Am I right etc.



"JODY CHANT (SOUND OFF 2)"



"Iraq-Bound Troops Confront Rumsfeld Over Lack of Armor"



"Oh Goody. Another Freakin’ Contest."







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3 Comments:

Blogger dance_fever77 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:27 AM, December 15, 2004  
Blogger Cosa Nostradamus said...

Sorry, but I had to delete that post because it contained personal information. Thank you for your post, but please do not post any personal information, for your protection, as well as mine. Thanks again.

7:02 PM, December 15, 2004  
Blogger Cosa Nostradamus said...

PS
email me at:
cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom

AT=@
DOT=.

thanks

8:23 PM, December 15, 2004  

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