IT'S TIME TO GO
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REPUKES & DINO'S OUT!
WE RECOMMEND A WHOLE NEW CONGRESS & CABINET
OR, HEY, OBAMA CAN GO TOO!
Some Modest Proposals For The Replacements
Hey, look, guys, um. This just isn't working out, y'know? I mean, we voted for "CHANGE," remember? So, anyway, pack your trash, OK, you have until sundown. We already have new guys. And gals.
1. Vice President: Joe, you're OK, but a little too acceptable to the assassin type: White. We need, like, a Cheney: Somebody even worse than Bush was the best insurance policy for him. So we're nominating Al Sharpton for Vice President.
2. Secretary of State: Now that Hillary has effectively been neutered... Or is it spayed? ...Anyway, she can be safely packed off to our first permanent settlement on the Moon. She can be La Regina Della Luna. We need the globetrotter job back for Nancy Pelosi. Anything to get her ineffectual ass out of DC.
3. Secretary of Defense: Stephen Colbert. They need a guy with a sense of humor. I think he might be gay, too. Also a plus. If not, then Rachel Maddow. Her Dad was military, so they should be kewl with that.
4. Secretary of the Treasury: Paul Krugman. So, nu?
5. Secretary of Homeland Security: NYPD's Ray Kelly, or LAPD's Benjamin Bratton. Anybody Rudy fired has to be good.
6. Secretary of Labor: Is Cesar Chavez still alive? How 'bout his son? Or anybody who has ever actually worked for a living.
7. Secretary of the Interior: Dennis Banks. It's only fair.
8. Secretary of Energy: A solar dude or dudette. Or Guy Kawasaki.
9. Secretary of Commerce: Someone from Orchard Street, in NYC. Or Omarosa?
10. Secretary of Transportation: Atrios. Maybe he'll shut up about trains if we let him run them.
11. Fed Chairman: Paul Krugman also. WHY not!?
12. Speaker Of The House: Is Bella Abzug reanimatable? If not, then Joyce Behar. Or Whoopie Goldberg.
13. Senate Majority Leader: Of course, Mr. Al Franken. Just for being so patient.
14. UN Ambassador: Mr. Monk. Here's the thing...
15. FEMA Chief: Any Mayor of New Orleans. BOO-YAH!!!
16. Bureau Of Indian Affairs: Leonard Peltier. For good behavior.
17. Dept of Veterans Affairs: Tammy Duckworth, so far so good; time for a promotion.
18. EPA: Kermit T. Frogg. He knows. It's not easy. Or Al Gore, if he can fit in the frog suit.
19. FBI Director: David Duchovny. I want to believe. The truth is out there. Trust no one. No smoking.
20. Supreme Court: Judge Judy, Judge Wapner, Judge Mathis, and Judge Dredd, just for balance. The liberals can stay, the Nazi's are OUT!
21. Pope: Guido Sarducci. Or Sinead O'Connor. Or me. I look good in tall hats.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:
.
.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:
SUPPORT OUR TROOPS: BRING THEM ALL HOME ALIVE, NOW!
REPUKES & DINO'S OUT!
WE RECOMMEND A WHOLE NEW CONGRESS & CABINET
OR, HEY, OBAMA CAN GO TOO!
Some Modest Proposals For The Replacements
Hey, look, guys, um. This just isn't working out, y'know? I mean, we voted for "CHANGE," remember? So, anyway, pack your trash, OK, you have until sundown. We already have new guys. And gals.
1. Vice President: Joe, you're OK, but a little too acceptable to the assassin type: White. We need, like, a Cheney: Somebody even worse than Bush was the best insurance policy for him. So we're nominating Al Sharpton for Vice President.
2. Secretary of State: Now that Hillary has effectively been neutered... Or is it spayed? ...Anyway, she can be safely packed off to our first permanent settlement on the Moon. She can be La Regina Della Luna. We need the globetrotter job back for Nancy Pelosi. Anything to get her ineffectual ass out of DC.
3. Secretary of Defense: Stephen Colbert. They need a guy with a sense of humor. I think he might be gay, too. Also a plus. If not, then Rachel Maddow. Her Dad was military, so they should be kewl with that.
4. Secretary of the Treasury: Paul Krugman. So, nu?
5. Secretary of Homeland Security: NYPD's Ray Kelly, or LAPD's Benjamin Bratton. Anybody Rudy fired has to be good.
6. Secretary of Labor: Is Cesar Chavez still alive? How 'bout his son? Or anybody who has ever actually worked for a living.
7. Secretary of the Interior: Dennis Banks. It's only fair.
8. Secretary of Energy: A solar dude or dudette. Or Guy Kawasaki.
9. Secretary of Commerce: Someone from Orchard Street, in NYC. Or Omarosa?
10. Secretary of Transportation: Atrios. Maybe he'll shut up about trains if we let him run them.
11. Fed Chairman: Paul Krugman also. WHY not!?
12. Speaker Of The House: Is Bella Abzug reanimatable? If not, then Joyce Behar. Or Whoopie Goldberg.
13. Senate Majority Leader: Of course, Mr. Al Franken. Just for being so patient.
14. UN Ambassador: Mr. Monk. Here's the thing...
15. FEMA Chief: Any Mayor of New Orleans. BOO-YAH!!!
16. Bureau Of Indian Affairs: Leonard Peltier. For good behavior.
17. Dept of Veterans Affairs: Tammy Duckworth, so far so good; time for a promotion.
18. EPA: Kermit T. Frogg. He knows. It's not easy. Or Al Gore, if he can fit in the frog suit.
19. FBI Director: David Duchovny. I want to believe. The truth is out there. Trust no one. No smoking.
20. Supreme Court: Judge Judy, Judge Wapner, Judge Mathis, and Judge Dredd, just for balance. The liberals can stay, the Nazi's are OUT!
21. Pope: Guido Sarducci. Or Sinead O'Connor. Or me. I look good in tall hats.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:
Suggestion Box & Tip Jar
We would like to make over this blog to make it easier to access, to read and to comment on. We would also like to serve our readers better by providing more of what you need and want to see. All serious suggestions will be considered. We hope to move to our own domain in the near future, and we would like to ask for your financial assistance in doing that, and in upgrading our hardware & software. Small one-time donations and larger long-term subscriptions are welcome. Exclusive advertising is also available. If you think we are wasting our time in doing all this, please let us know. If you wish to help us, now is the time. As always, negative bullsh*t from right-wing trolls will be sh*tcanned. Thank you to everyone else.
Please send feedback & PayPal contributions to cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom. Thanks.
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Labels: change of seasons, change we had better be able to believe in, changing of the guard, in with the new, lying DINO's, new blood, Obamacon, out with the old guard, we've been CONNED
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IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:
Suggestion Box & Tip Jar We would like to make over this blog to make it easier to access, to read and to comment on. We would also like to serve our readers better by providing more of what you need and want to see. All serious suggestions will be considered. We hope to move to our own domain in the near future, and we would like to ask for your financial assistance in doing that, and in upgrading our hardware & software. Small one-time donations and larger long-term subscriptions are welcome. Exclusive advertising is also available. If you think we are wasting our time in doing all this, please let us know. If you wish to help us, now is the time. As always, negative bullsh*t from right-wing trolls will be sh*tcanned. Thank you to everyone else. Please send feedback & PayPal contributions to cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom. Thanks.
SUPPORT OUR TROOPS: BRING THEM ALL HOME ALIVE, NOW!
posted by Cosa Nostradamus @ 8/17/2009 12:01:00 AM
View blog reactions
2 Comments:
Cosa, that list was awesome. Omarosa was my fave. I laughed out loud.
I wish I could afford to contribute. As of today it has been 15 months since I have received a paycheck... one thing you could do for free to change things up might be to try a new template? There's lots and lots of free ones that look unique... some I have even seen on blogger blogs that I have to do a double take that they are hosted by blogger. That's my only lame girly suggestion. I love your content... don't change a thing!
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Thanks, Skye.
And thank you for the suggestion. Exactly what I was looking for. You're always girly (and that's a good thing) but never lame.
I want to change the template, but I'd have to upgrade to "NEW" Blogger, and risk losing the archives. I just haven't gotten around to backing them all up yet.
Any comments on loading time or ease of use? I should make up a survey, maybe. Or a Tom Collins.
Tom Collins it is. Aaaahhh...
And get a job, ya bum! The hospitals are always looking for new doctors, y'know. I don't think they check what kind. All you have to do is keep yelling "STAT!" and "HE'S CODING!!!" That's what I do when I feel like doctoring at random hospitals around this great, sick nation of ours.
Sometimes I just walk into the waiting room at Emergency with a clipboard, a lab coat and a stethoscope and yell in my mini-bullhorn, "Medicaid has been canceled. If you voted for McCain, report to a recycling station. --NOW, Lady! Get the f**k up! I don't CARE if you can't walk! I'm a goddam REPUBLICAN doctor!"
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