Blog Me No Blogs: IS YOUR CELL PHONE KILLING YOU?

IS MINE?

Nobody Seems To Want To Know

Cross-posted at Cul's

"The EM Soup"

For those who don't know, cellular phones are radios that work on the same frequencies as radar: microwaves. Yup, like the junk-food nuker at 7-11, formerly known as the Radar Range. Legend has it that the cooking powers of radar were discovered by accident; fatal accidents for some swabbies: While standing in front of large shipboard radar transmitters, US Navy sailors were cooked alive, from the inside out.

Don't know if that's true, but it's possible. Those radar guns the cops had before they started using lasers to track your speed were retired for a reason: They were giving the officers testicular cancer. The cops tended to rest the gun, often still turned on, in their laps between zaps at the driving public. Result: Slow-cooked mountain oysters, human style. After many lawsuits, the PDs quit using them.

Now we see these Euroscientists finding that microwaves mess with your DNA, which could cause cancer.

Personally, I'm not afraid of my microwave oven. But I keep it in the kitchen, and it's not on all the time, bathing me in radiation. I checked the shielding specs before I bought it. AM, FM, shortwave radio, high and low voltage electrical transmissions, a little stray magnetism, they really don't bother me. I'm a modern kinda guy, I guess.

Unshielded microwaves that are always on are different. Microwave energy passes though most everything, except metal, sugar, fat and water. Metal reflects that very low frequency of energy waves. Sugar, fat and water absorb them: hence the cooking action. Most foods have some sugar, fat or water in them. So do most people. Should we be worried?

All those ugly, controversial microwave towers scattered across the eyeline everywhere, one set for every one of sometimes five, ten, fifteen local cell-phone companies, blanketing every square nanometer in who-knows what dosages of radar energy, 24/7/52? Now, that does worry me a bit.

You're more at risk if you have a transmitter in your ear, on your belt, up your ass, or wherever. They say it's all very low dosage. But what about the cumulative effect of all those transmitting towers and repeaters, over all this time?

We all know what metal does in the microwave, right? BZZZZZT!!!! Anybody got any fillings, out there? Surgical pins, metallic implants, pacemakers, plates in yer head? And then there's the iron and copper in your blood, and all those other trace minerals in every one of your cells.

OK, maybe this is sheer paranoia. But cancer used to be rare. Now it's common. Why? The problem is, industry doesn't want to know, and government isn't asking. Under these circumstances, kept in the dark and being fed bullshit, we poor wee mushrooms have a right to be paranoid. It's the only logical response. For mushrooms.

They say there's no proof microwaves from cell phones can hurt you. Is there any proof they can't hurt you? Think anybody has ever conducted a full real-world study of a contemporary neighbourhood, after say five years of full microwave coverage by a half-dozen or more cell-phone companies? I know they didn't do it before they deployed all that shit. Maybe they're doing it right now. And we're the guinnea pigs. Hey, I remember volunteering. Don't you?

Well, we're all going to die, anyway, right? Somebody might as well make some money off of our deaths, I guess. I just hope my death is not due to brain cancer. Or yours, either. That one kinda scares me. Surely, President Kerry and that new liberal Democratic Congress will take care of this, right? Say what? Oh. Hunh. But, he was winning when I went to bed. What TIME is it? [ y - a - w - n ]

See, there is a difference between Democrats and Republicans, liberals and conservatives. As any Republican will proudly tell you, Republicans are pro-business. Democrats are anti-business. Liberals believe in Big Government regulation of Industry. Conservatives believe in no regulation of anything. So, who is more likely to keep Big Business from cooking our asses, or giving our kids cancer? Hm?

Bush does have a plan, though. It's called "Free Unbridled Capitalism USA: Limited Liability," Or FUCUSALL. Deregulate everything, and take away the right to sue. See, he's lookin' out for us! Maybe we won't need Social Security, after all: Aw, Hell, let's just give all our hard-earned retirement money to those sober, industrious, irrationally exuberant folks on Wall Street! Why not!? We'll be dead! Who cares?! Party on, guys!

Or, you could complain to the FCC, which is SUPPOSED to regulate stuff like wireless digital cellular microwave telephones. Then there's your Congressperson... Here's you some links.

"How Your Microwave Works"

"How Your Cell Phone Works"

"How Your Government Works"

"How Your Congressperson Works... Or Not"

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