NAKED PIX: LARA FLYNN-BOYLE & FERGIE TOGETHER AT LAST!!!

Weight-Watchers Sues To Stop The Duchess

But who wants these photos? Even for charity, will there ever be buyers for this? Couldn't they get Angelina Jolie or the Bush girls? (I could contribute my Mardi Gras shots of them exposing themselves for cheap necklaces of beads, but I'm saving those for a rainy day.) It's Elton John's charity, so I guess they can't get Madonna.

Now that the immaterial girl's Jewish and all, I'd like to see how her tattoo removals came out. [Scars of a previous trend.] Or, maybe she just got circumcized. (It's a simple procedure, and men much prefer a nice, clean clitoris, free of all smegma.)

The nudie pix will be part of a "photographic project, not just a book." The book is to be called "Four Inches," so I guess Sir Elton will be nude in it, too. I said "I GUESS," OK???!!! He's never even been to Mardi Gras! (Who knows what he'd do for spangley beads?)

"Duchess to bare all for Sir Elton"

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