RULLY, LIKE STOOOOPID NEWS, DOOD
THE ALIENS ARE DEFINITELY GONNA EAT US
NO WAY WE CAN BEAT THEM AT CHESS. OR CHECKERS. OR TIDDLYWINKS.
YOUTUBE
"Funny UFO Prank"
Aliens are TURKEYS! Hope they don't show up on Thanksgiving!! Unless they're CANNIBALS!!!
Let's Hope They Don't Have A Cold Vaccine
YAHOO NEWS
"India celebrates planting its flag on moon"
They're starving in India, so I guess they went to the Moon to forage for food.
' India rejoiced Saturday at joining an elite club by planting its flag on the moon as the country's space agency released the first pictures of the cratered surface taken by its maiden lunar mission. A probe sent late Friday from the orbiting mother spacecraft took pictures and gathered other data India needs for a future moon landing as it plummeted to a crash-landing at the moon's south pole, said Indian Space Research Organization spokesman B.R. Guruprasad. '
YAHOO NEWS
"The Saudis' dubious interfaith agenda at the UN"
The Saudi's, who won't allow U.S. oilmen, servicemen and diplomats to go to their own churches on Saudi soil, are gonna teach the rest of us TOLERANCE!!! OK.
' World leaders gathering at the United Nations this week for a special session of the General Assembly to advance interfaith dialogue should have no illusions that their efforts will miraculously promote mutual respect between religious communities or end abuses of religious freedom. Saudi King Abdullah, who initiated this week's special session, is quietly enlisting the leaders' support for a global law to punish blasphemy – a campaign championed by the 56-member Organization of Islamic Conference that puts the rights of religions ahead of individual liberties. '
YAHOO NEWS
"Tomboy protests a security threat?"
I guess this is why the men wear dresses over there, too.
' Malaysia's police, who have recently cracked down on dissident bloggers and broken up anti-government demonstrations, say that protests over an edict against Muslim women wearing trousers are a security threat. Mainly Muslim Malaysia's National Fatwa Council recently issued a religious ruling that wearing trousers was un-Islamic. It said that, by wearing trousers, young girls risked becoming "tomboys" who became sexually active. '
YAHOO NEWS
"Taiwanese court orders former president detained"
Yer next, Dubya. Heh-heh, heh-heh.
' Lai Ching-te of the Democratic Progressive Party said Chen, 57, claimed he was attacked by a member of the prosecutors' staff while in transit between a Taipei prosecutors' office and the nearby Taipei District Court. Chen was taken to a Taipei hospital where doctors concluded that he suffered only a minor muscle injury. He was then returned to court and the session resumed. Prosecutors denied there had been any attack. The episode was a bizarre development in a day that began with Chen facing more than five hours of grilling from investigators looking into allegations of money laundering during his recently concluded presidency. Early Tuesday afternoon, he was driven in handcuffs from the prosecutors' office in downtown Taipei to the nearby court building. '
YAHOO NEWS
"Sheriff to ban deputies from mixing drinking, guns"
Not even one for the road?
' The sheriff of Los Angeles County plans to prohibit his off-duty deputies from carrying their guns while drinking because several have been accused in recent years of firing weapons while intoxicated. Sheriff Lee Baca says there has been a disturbing rise in alcohol-fueled misbehavior among his deputies in the nation's largest sheriff's department. Since 2004, more than a dozen deputies have been accused of brandishing or shooting a gun while under the influence of alcohol. At least 61 have been arrested this year on alcohol-related charges, 39 of them for driving under the influence, and most of them were armed at the time. '
LOWER HUDSON JOURNAL NEWS
"Yorktown police officer remembers life-changing UFO sighting"
Now, this is what happens when you have more than one for the road.
' "It was a tremendous object, wing-shaped, coming towards me. ... It had landing lights - white lights - all white lights that stretched a good 200 yards," said Soravilla, now a lieutenant. Because it was only 1,000 feet in the air, to his estimation, he thought it was in trouble and he jumped out of his cruiser. But instead of crashing, it started flashing colors of alternating green, blue and amber, making a sonic sweeping sound. "At this point it stopped, and this is when I kind of got a little frightened," Soravilla said during a recent interview at police headquarters. "It pivoted, like on an axis, and started to move westward." It was as close an encounter as anyone would have in a night with hundreds of UFO reports from New Castle to Danbury, Conn., and he hadn't seen it all yet. Not wanting to put such an anomalous report on the radio, Soravilla drove back to headquarters, where the dispatcher was already overwhelmed with UFO calls. Then about 9 p.m., when police departments in Carmel, Kent and Brewster indicated that the lights had been there and were headed back to Yorktown, Soravilla walked out of headquarters with a dispatcher and a friend from the highway department to see if they could spot it again. "Unbelievable," Soravilla said. "It starts to come right over the hill. Right towards us. Tremendous. Huge." Remembering his training, he tried to determine a sound: "It was actually dead silence." Trusting his observation, he tried to determine a shape among the lights, only 500 feet above: "I didn't see any structure, but when it passed over it blocked out the stars. "My legs were shaking," he said. "I never saw anything like it in my life." '
YAHOO NEWS
"Strange Portal Connects Earth to Sun"
At home, we just call it "The Sky."
' Like giant, cosmic chutes between the Earth and sun, magnetic portals open up every eight minutes or so to connect our planet with its host star. Once the portals open, loads of high-energy particles can travel the 93 million miles (150 million km) through the conduit during its brief opening, space scientists say. Called a flux transfer event, or FTE, such cosmic connections not only exist but are possibly twice as common as anyone ever imagined, according to space scientists who attended the 2008 Plasma Workshop in Huntsville, Ala., last week. '.
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Labels: absurd, asinine, bizarre, curious, dumb, funny, headlines, incredible, laughable, news, odd, queer, reports, ridiculous, stories, strange, stupid, unbelievable, unusual, weird
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