ROCKEFELLER STEALS CHILD

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WEALTHY DAD ABDUCTS DIVORCE DAUGHTER

FIRST THE OIL, NOW THE CHILDREN?

What Is The World Coming To When The Rich Can Steal Our Children?

It's not bad enough that these filthy oil people "drink our milkshakes." Now, they're drinking our children's milkshakes! With oil and gasoline at an all-time high, I guess they're so rich they think they get away with anything. Maybe it's one last stand for Big Awl before their boy Dubya gets rode atta town on a rail. He can always issue pardons before he goes.

In fact, I predict a wholesale crime spree, as Republicans everywhere rush to cash in their get-out-of-jail-free cards before Bush goes to prison in the Hague. The recent shotgun blasts in an Tennessee Unitarian Church by a right-winger angry at "libruls" may be only the beginning. Dick Cheney and Antonin Scalia will be gunning for moderates, liberals, progressives and radicals wherever they go. Keep yer heads down, folks.

Today is the day to register Republican, if you plan on committing a crime. With gun ownership now mandatory, and failure to own a gun punishable by death, you might as well shoot somebody while you're at it. They're having a Second Amendment Blow-Out Sale at the Justice Department. Dubya will be pardoning all of them, too.

UPDATE: Well, the Rockefeller's now say this kidnapper is not even related to them: He's an impostor, a fakefeller. And you know what happens to those, if you saw "There Will Be Blood." Well, even if you didn't see it, get a clue, there will be blood. It's Shark Week, and the abductor is yachting his way to Bermuda, they say. He'd better stay away from the family's offshore oil rigs. Well.


"Manhunt for missing girl abducted by high society father"


"Police: Man shot churchgoers over liberal views"


"Justice Officials Repeatedly Broke Law on Hiring, Report Says"


"Lock and Load--It's the Law! "
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