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Monday, January 03, 2005

NAVY HAULS ASS!


HONG KONG TO ACEH, INDONESIA IN 3 DAYS!

However Slow Rummy & Dubya May Be,
Your Sailors & Marines Are Shit Hot!


On the job: The aircraft carrier USS Abraham Lincoln, named for the first Republican President (who defeated the slaving South and freed all African-Americans from bondage: One of only two great Republicans, ever... ) and the helicopter carrier assault ship USS Bonhomme Richard (named in honour of the ship gifted us by the French in the Revolutionary War, in turn named after Benjamin "Poor Richard" Franklin, and lost in the victorious battle resulting in the capture of HMS Serapis in 1779, to whose captain our own John Paul Jones uttered the immortal words, "Sir, I have not yet begun to fight.").

Balls, by Gawd! The US Navy certainly has them. And needed them, especially in the early years of the Republic. Up against the world's only remaining then-contemporary naval super-power, Great Britain, and such miscreants as the Barbary pirates, US sailors and Marines in small fleets and single ships rammed the Starry Blue Jack up obstreperous asses all over the world: From the halls of Montezuma to the shores of Tripoli, Anchors A-Weigh, Baby! Those were the days when one bold ship of the line could turn the whole tide of a war. Conquer a country. Subdue a tyrant. Rescue a nation

Today, they do the work of tyrants, misfortunately. But the men and women of your armed forces would rather be saving the world, than oppressing it. Be proud that they cut such a wake across barbaric seas, to save the souls of "heathen" children, asking no conversions. Toys for tots my royal white ass! They're feeding babies like milky mothers. Your grizzled Marines and salty sailors are carrying kids from stinking mud puddles to clean white hospitals in their own strong arms, and doing it in your name: America.

Unhappily, a single ship can no longer turn a tide, as in olden days. In fact, we need a hundred, no, a thousand boats across the seas from Thailand to Somalia. But the degenerate Republicans will not send them. O My Captain! How awful for our Republic, that it cannot give its' all for life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness! Alas and alack, we don't have an Abraham Lincoln, or a Benjamin Franklin, today: We have only a Dubya. A single character. And not muchaone.

But we can still hope, we last remaining True Americans: The liberals. See, ladies and gentlemen, we are still that great, ballsy little country that stunned the British Empire, and the world, over two hundred years ago. We just need a chance to prove it, now and again.








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IS THIS ANY WAY TO RUN A PLANET?


GOSH... SORRY... HATE TO BE A PEST, BUT THIS IS CHICKENSHIT!


150,000 Dead, 5 Million+ Homeless, Hundreds Of Billions In Reconstruction Costs in 12 Countries...


And The United States of America sends two measley carrier groups after a delay of a whole week? To cover an area of over 2,800 miles in length, Gawd knows how many square miles? Japan pledges $500 million, and we slowly come up to $350 million, with our much-larger economy? Then we send two besmirched ex-Presidents to schill for private donations, knowing it will be meaningless with the huge costs of rebuilding. It's fucking window dressing. It's a HUGE waste of time, intended only as a distraction from the insubstantial Bush response. A royal dog & pony show.

Anyway, private citizens have been on the bandwagon for over a week. It's governments that are slagging off: And this new "Thousand Points of Light" bullshit once more puts wacko Bush ideology ahead of real needs: A pittance from charity to do the work only government has the resources to do. What the fuck ARE we paying taxes for, anyway? It's bullshit.


The relief operations are stalled in many areas, after taking up to a full week to get there in the first place. Local governments are in chaos, where they exist at all. While the "international community" dithers, people are dying. So, what does Dubya do? Continue his pissing contest with the United Nations, and short-shrift government aid in favour of very telegenic pan-handling by ex-Presidents. Enough with the Neocon's ideological war against Reality! Reality is WINNING, guys! People are LOSING, thanks to you conservatives!


If you've already given cash to the relief efforts, my liberal friends, what you need to do now is email the White House, and Congress, and let them know you expect a much greater effort, and much quicker, with far more resources, for however long it takes to make all the survivors whole. Do it now. Use my letter, or write your own:



Dear Mr. President/ Ms. Senator/ Representative


I am greatly displeased with your own response to the disaster in Asia. As my elected representative, I want you to see to it personally that hundreds of BILLIONS are appropriated NOW for tsunami relief. Please ensure that these funds are put into action today, not tomorrow. And let's get two carrier groups at each and every major tsunami site, for disaster relief NOW! I will never vote for you or your party again if you do not. For God's sake, stand up for something!


MON 3 JAN 2005




EMAIL YOUR PRESIDENT


FIND & EMAIL YOUR SENATORS & CONGRESSMAN/WOMAN






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