JACKSON FUNERAL? MJ IS ALIVE & WELL!
FUNERAL JUST SHOW: KING OF POP
MOVES IN WITH THE PALINS
SARAH PALIN HAS TURNED TRIG OVER TO
MICHAEL JACKSON FOR "POP THERAPY"
Love-Starved Star Just Wanted Attention, Offered To Solve Palin's Money Problems
Two of the new millenium's great mysteries were solved in one shot today, as Michael Jackson sat up in his coffin and began singing, then danced his way through astonished crowds and into a waiting chopper which whisked him to LAX behind a huge LAPD helicopter escort. Alaska Governor Sarah Palin was there at the airport with her new corporate jet, Chosen-1, a gift from Jackson, to whisk the freshly resurrected musician off to the new home she will share with Jackson in the 49th State: The Wasilla Dome, recently purchased and specially redone as a kiddie playland by Michael Jackson in return for full custody of all male children in the extended Palin family under the age of puberty. Palin's daughter is now pregnant and hoping for another boy for the King Of Pop.
"It's like the parting of the Red Sea, or velcro, or just a damned miracle" the Governor gushed. "Michael is backing my run for the Presidency next year, and I'm helping him with his problems, and by golly, the Lord sure moves in mysterious ways! Together, we'll have this country straightened out in no time, you betchya!" she finished with a wink.
Jackson's publicists apologized to fans, saying that Michael felt that he needed to see if his fans still loved him, and to reboot his career. One of his security doubles volunteered to undergo an autopsy in Jacko's place. He will be buried tomorrow with a copy of Jackson's new CD. Sales of the CD are now through the roof, proving Jackson's career revival strategy worked. Republicans across the nation praised Palin's new patron, and invited him to Klan meetings across the country, now that he is white, and born again.
Labels: alaska, career move, dancer, dead, funeral, governor, Jacksons, King Of Pop, Michael Jackson, MJ, musician, pedophile, Republican, resigned, Sarah Palin, sexual predator, The Jackson Family, Trig
TO POST A COMMENT: CLICK ON "COMMENTS," "Post a Comment" or "# of COMMENTS" just below the SOCIAL BOOKMARKING LINKS (Digg, Delicious, etc), about three inches down from here. Please do comment. Thank you.
IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:
Suggestion Box & Tip Jar We would like to make over this blog to make it easier to access, to read and to comment on. We would also like to serve our readers better by providing more of what you need and want to see. All serious suggestions will be considered. We hope to move to our own domain in the near future, and we would like to ask for your financial assistance in doing that, and in upgrading our hardware & software. Small one-time donations and larger long-term subscriptions are welcome. Exclusive advertising is also available. If you think we are wasting our time in doing all this, please let us know. If you wish to help us, now is the time. As always, negative bullsh*t from right-wing trolls will be sh*tcanned. Thank you to everyone else. Please send feedback & PayPal contributions to cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom. Thanks.
SUPPORT OUR TROOPS: BRING THEM ALL HOME ALIVE, NOW!