LAST-MINUTE MOTHER'S DAY GIFTS!

.
NOW IN STOCK - GUARANTEED DELIVERY TODAY!!

YOU SPACED-OUT, THOUGHTLESS, UNGRATEFUL BASTARD!!!

Send Your Mom A Link To This Page Of Songs About Mommys


Top Ten Last-Minute Mother's Day Gifts
(all available at 7-11)

10. Condoms

9. Blank Greeting Cards
(Enclose one condom; inscribe card: "MOM!!! Why didn't you USE one of these???"
--Mom's got a sense of humor, right? Right?)

8. Gummybears (Don't eat them all, on the way to her house. They're for HER!)

7. Milk (She prob'ly needs some. And she'll appreciate the symbolism. Unless she didn't breastfeed you...)

6. The local newspaper (Let her know you are aware of her intellect, as well as her interest in current affairs and the coupons.)

5. A Big Bite (OK, you can eat this one. Just so you can say, "Yeah, I ate, Ma, I'm not hungry, really," when she plies you with ambrosia or octopus salad.)

4. A Big Gulp (See Number Five)

3. One Pack Of Cigarettes, her brand (She still smokes, right? Start measuring the windows for drapes... )

2. One box of stale Valentine's Day candy

1. One pathetic wilted rose

Put them all together, and they spell "UNGRATEFUL LITTLE BASTARD!!!"

So, here it is, the Sunday Rock'N'Roll Music Video Contest Party Mother's Day Edition Salute To Muthas:


YOUTUBE: JOHN WINSTON LENNON & THE PLASTIC ONO BAND
"John Lennon in Madison Square Garden / Mother"
Primal screaming for a new Mommy.



YOUTUBE: MARY COUGHLAN
"Mary Coughlan - Mother's little helper"
The Stones' video is still blocked by cultural artifact thieves, aka "record companies," after forty years. But Mary's got it right.



YOUTUBE: THE BEATLES: "MAGICAL MYSTERY TOUR"
"The Beatles - Your Mother Should Know"
Yeah! She should!



YOUTUBE: THE DOORS
"The Doors - The end"
Jim Morrison, the ultimate motherf**ker.



YOUTUBE: PARLIAMENT FUNKADELIC
"Red Hot Mama Studio Version - Parliament Funkadelic"
Get down, get FUNKY, Ma!



YOUTUBE: FIGGHOLE
"Song for Sarah Palin: FIGGHOLE - "Red, White, and MILF""
Rockin retards!



YOUTUBE: CATHERINE DENEUVE
"Recording of "Joyeux anniversaire maman" - Catherine Deneuve"
OK, so it's not your birthday, Ma. But it's CATHERINE DENEUVE!!!



YOUTUBE: THE MOTHERS OF INVENTION "WE'RE ONLY IN IT FOR THE MONEY"
"Frank Zappa - 06 - Bow tie daddy"
Sorry, "Motherly Love" was not available. But now you're ready for the dreaded tie-fest, Father's Day.

.
.

TO POST A COMMENT: CLICK ON "COMMENTS," "Post a Comment" or "# of COMMENTS" just below the SOCIAL BOOKMARKING LINKS (Digg, Delicious, etc), about three inches down from here. Please do comment. Thank you.

IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:

Suggestion Box & Tip Jar We would like to make over this blog to make it easier to access, to read and to comment on. We would also like to serve our readers better by providing more of what you need and want to see. All serious suggestions will be considered. We hope to move to our own domain in the near future, and we would like to ask for your financial assistance in doing that, and in upgrading our hardware & software. Small one-time donations and larger long-term subscriptions are welcome. Exclusive advertising is also available. If you think we are wasting our time in doing all this, please let us know. If you wish to help us, now is the time. As always, negative bullsh*t from right-wing trolls will be sh*tcanned. Thank you to everyone else. Please send feedback & PayPal contributions to cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom. Thanks.

SUPPORT OUR TROOPS: BRING THEM ALL HOME ALIVE, NOW!