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But We're Passing The Savings Along To You, The Weird & Funny News Consumer. You're Welcome!

We've been out of it for a while. Health problems, financial problems, problem problems. Problems. Now we're trying to catch up. Some of this may not be news to some of you, but it all strikes us as interesting, weird, funny, sad or scary. And we're too tired to write any more. So we'll just pass this all along to you now, if that's OK. Yaaaaaawn...


OREGON LIVE.COM
"Feathered fuel tank soaks up hydrogen"
Now if they could only find a way to tell chickensh*t from chicken salad.

' The gas tank of the future may be full of chicken feathers. Engineers have discovered a way to store large amounts of hydrogen fuel using carbonized downy fluff, which could help pave the way to clean, green cars. Treated chicken feathers work like a sponge. They soak up large amounts of hydrogen and hold it in a small space so the tank can be a conventional size and the fuel won't need to held under dangerously high pressures. "The question came up," Wool said, "of what to do with the six billion pounds of waste chicken feathers" produced every year. He experimented for years with various ways to use feathers and eventually wondered if they might store hydrogen. Scientists have long known that hydrogen sticks well to carbon surfaces. Research has focused on tiny nanotubes, in which sheets of carbon are rolled into a compact space. The problem is nanotubes are expensive: A 20-gallon tank of them can cost more than $1 million. Chicken feather fibers are mostly composed of keratin, a natural protein that forms strong, hollow tubes. The breakthrough moment came when researchers heated feathers to 700 degrees, causing a process called carbonization that created billions of tiny pores. They had found an ideal place to pack large amounts of hydrogen. The new feather-based material can be produced at a small fraction of carbon nanotubes' cost. A 20-gallon feather-based tank would be about $100. '

STUFF.CO.NZ
"Eyebrows up, blowup dolls down in Undy 500"
Not sure if love-doll marriage is legal down under. The land of wonder. The land down underpants.

' Queenstowner Mark Ferguson, 42, turned heads and dropped jaws when he turned up to the underwear raceday wearing just carpet slippers and a pair of tiny white underpants which he shared with inflatable friend "Brian". Ferguson and Brian lined up against about a dozen other semi-naked guys (none of whom had inflatable sextoys in their underpants) to race a several-hundred-metre course up and down the beach in Queenstown Bay. Over hay bales, under hurdles and into the lake they went. Ferguson was knocked out in an early heat, but he was not blaming the result on the rapidly deflating Brian. "He kept me nice and warm," he said. A veteran of the first Undy 500 at Queenstown Winter Festival 1996, Ferguson instead blamed his early exit on his decision to wear carpet slippers a poor choice, he reflected, in the era of professional sport. '

USA TODAY
"New 'American Patriot's Bible' sees USA's 'godly roots' "
Further proof that God is dead. Or deaf, dumb and blind.

' "This Bible is designed for the decent, hardworking core of America, the ordinary man or woman who loves this nation and believes it springs from godly roots," says Richard G. Lee, a Southern Baptist pastor from Georgia who served as the Bible's general editor. Lee is the founding pastor of the 4,000-member First Redeemer Church in Cumming, Ga. A registered Republican who's organizing an Independence Day-themed "Restoring America" conference featuring conservatives David Limbaugh and Oliver North, Lee said he's "disappointed" when politicians "use the word of God for the purpose of vote getting." His goal was to create a "non-partisan" Bible, but he quotes Republican Ronald Reagan more times than Democrats Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton, Lyndon Johnson and John F. Kennedy combined. In an interview, Lee said he doesn't even know if Carter, a fellow Georgian and longtime Baptist Sunday school teacher, is a Christian. As for President Obama? "I haven't seen any patriotism from him yet." Lee sprinkles his Bible with some 300 articles about "The Battle Hymn of the Republic," the right to keep and bear arms, the war in Iraq and religious broadcasting. While some have praised the Patriot's Bible— former House Speaker Newt Gingrich called it "fascinating" — others have condemned it as something akin to theological and political heresy. "Get thee behind me, Satan," wrote "Crunchy Con" blogger Rod Dreher on Beliefnet. "To the extent that this Bible's publishers conflate serving Christ with patriotism … they are corrupt, and corrupters." Evangelical author and pastor Greg Boyd's lengthy critique, posted on Christianity Today's website, calls Lee's Bible "idolatrous," saying, "There's not a single commentary in this Bible that even attempts to shed light on what the biblical text actually means." '

BBC NEWS
"US dinosaur had Chinese cousin"
Hey, maybe we can start naming our dinosaurs after US Presidents! Republican Presidents. Reaganus Megastupidus? Tyrannus Dubyus? Crookus Nixonius? Hooverus Depressus?

' Scientists in China say they have identified the first Asian example of a group of dinosaurs previously found only in the Americas and Europe. The researchers say the specimen is closely related to the Sauroposeidon dinosaur fossils of North America and have named it Qiaowanlong kangxii after a Chinese emperor of the Qing dynasty. '

MITRE.ORG
"Every Little Thing It Does Is MAJIIC: A Technology for the Net-centric Age"
Does it bother anybody that our military boffins , or their PR people, use so many terms and references from lame TV shows? "MAJIIC," "Quantum Leap"? Really, dude? Oh, well, as long as Al Qaida doesn't have any hackers, we're safe. They don't have any hackers, right? Right?

' Members of a Special Forces Unit head toward a spot in Iraq, not knowing exactly what conditions they will find or where the moving target is. As they get closer, they call up digital maps and visuals in the transport vehicle—visuals taken in real time from surveillance sensors in the area. Even a year ago, much of this wasn't possible. Is it magic? No, it's MAJIIC, an innovative concept that's moved from prototype to nearly deployed technology with multiple sponsors in a few short years. The MAJIIC (Multi-sensor Aerospace-ground Joint ISR Interoperability Coalition) Advanced Concept Technology Demonstration, a concept MITRE helped to develop, pulls streaming data from airborne surveillance platforms, using Web-services technology to pass the information to the people who need it most. The "ISR" in MAJIIC stands for intelligence, surveillance, and reconnaissance—just the type of information a pilot or tank commander needs before or during battle. That makes MAJIIC a potentially powerful part of the growing collection of net-centric tools the military requires in the 21st century. The ideas behind network-centric operations are still relatively new, and the existence of operational net-centric technology even newer. For decades, the Department of Defense (DOD) has followed the "process-before-post" approach to handling data and images. Analysts sort and evaluate images and other types of data before sending the results back into the field—a painstaking, sometime hours- or even days-long process. By using the power of the network to send information directly to field personnel and command centers, warfighters receive what they need to know quickly and efficiently, in many cases within minutes of its collection. The military calls this method of handling information "post before process." According to MITRE's John Kane, a systems engineer and technical manager for the program, "MAJIIC works in a 'pull' environment, not a broadcast or data-push environment. Users will be able to discover these data services dynamically, even if they have never heard of MAJIIC. Users can query for ISR data within certain coordinates or topics and view the data over low bandwidth communications." All information posts and inquiries occur within a secure, secret-level environment, using enterprise-wide, Web-based tools. One Leap for a Program: Although still in its development phase, MAJIIC was demonstrated this past August at Quantum Leap 2—a high-level showcase of net-centric technology sponsored by the Office of the Assistant Secretary of Defense for Networks and Information Integration. The demonstration performed successfully and generated a lot of enthusiasm from the services, so much so that MAJIIC is scheduled to be operational in 2005. '

SAN FRANCISCO CHRONICLE
"Backup plan to get NASA to moon cheaper"
It's either this or a Great Wall Of Lunar China staring at us every night.

' Like a car salesman pushing a luxury vehicle that the customer no longer can afford, NASA has pulled out of its back pocket a deal for a cheaper ride to the moon. It won't be as powerful, and its design is a little dated. Think of it as a base-model Ford station wagon instead of a tricked-out Cadillac Escalade. Officially, the space agency is still on track with a 4-year-old plan to spend $35 billion to build new rockets and return astronauts to the moon in several years. However, a top NASA manager is floating a cut-rate alternative that costs around $6.6 billion. This cheaper option is not as powerful as NASA's current design with its fancy new rockets, the people-carrying Ares I and cargo-lifting Ares V. But the cut-rate plan would still get to the moon. '

FARM FOUNDATION.ORG
"What's Driving Food Prices?"
So, the price of oil and the price of corn are linked. And both are driven by speculation on the commodities markets. So, Wall Street is eating good when oil prices rise, anyway.

' Since 2006, energy and agricultural markets have become closely linked as biofuels production surged. Ethanol and biodiesel were linked as energy substitutes for gasoline and diesel, and usage of crops for these biofuels became large enough to influence world prices. In the last half of 2008, crude oil prices fell rapidly, but gasoline prices fell faster and further. Low gasoline and crude oil prices reduced the expected use of corn for ethanol which, in turn, put pressure on ethanol prices and corn prices. By the end of 2008, the ethanol industry’s economic fortunes had deteriorated such that up to two billion gallons of capacity was idled. There have been changes in the way markets are now functioning but the basic relationship between crude oil and corn remains strong. '

SOURCE
"OTHER WEIRD, FUNNY & SCARY NEWS"

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