OBAMA'S REAL BIRTH CERTIFICATE
EXHAUSTIVE AFRICAN RECORD SEARCH REVEALS OBAMA IS HALF BLACK,
ER, NOT A CITIZEN!!!
THE BIRFERS WERE RIGHT!!!
Even A Rightard Is Right Twice A Day. OK, Maybe Once In A Geological Epoch.
Hey, old bitter white guys who can't win legitimate elections, how ya doin'? Still having a tough time getting over this "Negro" in the White House thing, hunh? Awwww. There, there. What you need is a real tinfoil-hatted conspiracy theory! Remember the good old days when we could still afford to spend $60,000,000 investigating a bl-w j-b? Yeah. Good times.
Well you blew every last dime we left you in 2000, so I'm all ya got. Luckily for you, I'm willing to donate my time to straighten your sh*t out. In all honesty, we just don't want any more subnormals from the Mainland jamming up the lines at the Hawaii State Department of Health. Or the men's rooms at the airport. So, read this and weep, cornpones:
Our Hawaii State Department of Health Director made it clear last year that Obama was a "local-boy." His Mom was a long-time UH Manoa scholar who studied abroad but sent her kids home to Honolulu to get a top-notch American education. Obama's granny, who raised him, was fixture on the local business scene. Barry was a well-known scholar & athlete at the prestigious Punahou School, a stand-out in a tiny local black population.
As to any collusion in some imaginary conspiracy to put a BLACK mooslim furriner in our sacred WHITE House, let it be known that:
A. In Hawaii, you're supposed to be a certain shade of brown, neither lighter nor darker. Obama was always "too dark." He grew up in an era when the older generation here did not have a lot of fondness for "popolo's." NOBODY in power, especially in our white conservative establishment local media, would have ever done anything to help a black guy scam his way into the White House. The birth notices in the Advertiser and the Star Bulletin are legit.
B. The "Certificate Of Live Birth" is what everybody born here has. It's what we call a birth certificate. The only alternative is, presumably, a Certificate of Dead Birth, which I'm sure the violent racist lunatic right-wing birfers would have preferred.
C. Our State Health Dept is currently run by Republicans, and has been for some years. Our Republican Governor left the Aloha State in the middle of a crisis just to campaign AGAINST Obama. She refused to even attend the Nat'l Gov's Assoc.'s first meeting with Obama after the election, she's so partisan. Yet even she says the President is a citizen.
D. The local Democratic machine was for Hillary, not Obama (except Abercrombie and the younger generation, and the voters). They would not have helped him fake anything.
E. If there was ANY suggestion, in REALITY, that Obama was not US-born, don't you think pit-bull Hillary would have brought it up during her desperately brutal, endlessly long and un-Democratically vicious no-holds-barred campaign against him? She all but suggested that he be assassinated, fer chrissakes. But she never questioned his birth.
F. The kind of far-reaching, technically sophisticated conspiracy the birfers are suggesting is WAY beyond the abilities of anybody in these little Isles. Only the Feds could have pulled this off, and they were under the control of Republicans and conservative Democrats (inc. Clintonistas) up until this year, ever since Obama was a child.
G. Yo, Repukes: You LOST! It was our first full, free and fair election in EIGHT years! The majority of the American people were shocked and angered when you screwed us out of our victories in 2000 & 2004. But we didn't try to disrupt the government, suggest that the POTUS should be "lynched" or removed from office on a spurious petty technicality, or pray for America to "FAIL"! So love it or leave it, you ridiculous losers. We won. You lost. Get f**kin' OVER it, already!
H. Birfers. BWAWAHAWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!! BIRFERS!!!
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Labels: certificate of live birth, conservatard nutjobs, Hawaii birth certificate, not a citizen, President Barack Hussein Obama II, racist a-holes, right-tard conspiracy theories, sore losers, USA
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