BUMPER STICKERS FOR CHRIST
AND OTHER NAZI HEROES
WILL NOT FIT ON HYBRIDS:
PERFECT FOR HUMMERS
From The Bumper-Sticker Minds Of Conservatives
The New Bible is scrawled on bashed-in automobile fenders and pasted in the cracked back windows of pick-up trucks. The morons who pilot these message-driven VEE-hicles don't have time for whole sentences. Grunts suffice. A whole book, even a Good Book is just too much for our Jesus-freaks these days. They have Jesus coloring books, Christ cartoons, divine video games, Xtian DVDs, even Christian rock, for those who prefer to whistle the liturgy.
The real reason they've strayed so far from the New Testament is that they'd really rather be living in the Old Testament. That's where all the intra-familial begettin' & beheadin' is at. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, waterboard for no reason at all. Good old religious torture porn by the chapter and verse. But it's damned, I mean, derned hard goin' for the home-skewld. That's why we've produced these handy bumper stickers that express the true religious feelings of the average red-State redneck. You know, the assholes who put the fundament in fundamentalist?
You're welcome, yawl. Lick 'em before ya stick 'em. That'll he'p yer marriages, too.
Double-click to enlarge, then right-click to download. Hi-rez versions available by request:
Labels: asinine, Bumper-stickers, car talk, Conservative, dumb, fender-mind-benders, funny, humorous, idiotic, laughable, Political, rear-end reading, religious, ridiculous, sayings, silly, slogans, stupid
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