FUNNY NAMES IN THE NEWS

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A ROSE IS A RUSE IS A RABBLE-ROUSER

YOUTUBE: FOX NEWS
"Jesse Ventura On Fox And Friends Debating Water Boarding"
MAN NAMED AFTER FREEWAY RUNS OVER TALKING HEAD


WHAT'S IN A NAME? I DUNNO, BUNCHA LETTERS, I GUESS?

Ironies Abound, Absurdities Astound, Morons Can Go Pound Sand

OK, grow up! Just because some one or some thing has a funny-sounding name... HEY! I said GROW UP, Schickelgruber! Who are you to laugh? And it's MISTER Cosanostradamus, to you!


REUTERS
"Toll Brothers homebuilding revenue dives 51 percent"
And the house cookies are crumbling!

' Toll Brothers Inc (TOL.N) said on Wednesday that it expected to report a 51 percent drop in quarterly homebuilding revenue, but said new orders had improved from the prior period, reflecting a seasonal upturn. '

CONGRESSIONAL QUARTERLY
"Democrat Chu, Republican Chu to Face Off for Vacant California House Seat"
Chu - Chu? Was this in Chattanooga? Do they swallow, too?

' Democrat Judy Chu, a member of California's tax equalization board, won the crucial Democratic nomination in Tuesday's special primary election for the state's vacant 32nd Congressional District seat. Chu now will be heavily favored to win the July 14 special general election for the seat that former incumbent Hilda L. Solis vacated in February to become President Barack Obama's Labor secretary. The 32nd District, located in east Los Angeles and some near-in suburbs, is overwhelmingly Democratic. In fact, the biggest problem Chu is likely to face in the runoff round is name confusion. The winner of the Republican nomination is Betty Tom Chu, a Monterey Park city councilwoman, whom local news reports say is related to Judy Chu by marriage. '

US NEWS & WORLD REPORT
"Republicans Say No to "Democrat-Socialist" Resolution and Clown Suits"
Now if they could just stop wearing the great big shoes, and all piling into one little car...

' Give credit where it's due: RNC Chairman Michael Steele managed some successful party leadership today. Though in all fairness, that leadership essentially took the form of convincing his fellow Republicans not to dress up in a collective clown suit and convey their policy preferences through air horn blasts. From CNN.com: Members of the Republican National Committee appear to have reached a compromise that would let GOP leaders avoid a possible dispute over a controversial resolution that calls on Democrats to re-name their party the "Democrat Socialist party." Steele has come out against the resolution, calling it "not an appropriate way to express our views on the issues of the day." One of Steele's allies on the committee, Florida GOP chairman Jim Greer, told CNN the resolution is "stupid" and "ridiculous." So... instead of re-nicknaming the Democratic Party (which they already call the Democrat Party) as the "Democrat Socialist Party," they're going simply vote to condemn the "Democrats' march toward socialism." What's really both funny and scary about all of this is how seriously the fringe-nuts in the GOP take it. According to the Washington Post, one RNC member who authored the Democrat-Socialist resolution had this to say: "This will be an opportune time for the RNC to exert bold and aggressive leadership by the passage of these resolutions, which our members and supporters are crying out for and which the American people need and deserve," one of the authors of resolution, Jim Bobb, an RNC member from Indiana, told the committee in a letter. '

CONTRA COSTA TIMES
"What's in name? Facebook may think its fake"
Hey,man, don't trust anybody who doesn't use their real name on line!

' Alicia Istanbul woke up one recent Wednesday to find herself locked out of the Facebook account she opened in 2007, one Facebook suddenly deemed fake. The stay-at-home mom was cut off not only from her 330 friends, including many she had no other way of contacting, but also from the pages she had set up for the jewelry design business she runs from her Atlanta-area home. Although Istanbul understands why Facebook insists on having real people behind real names for every account, she wonders why the online hangout didn't simply ask before acting. "They should at least give you a warning, or at least give you the benefit of the doubt," she said. "I was on it all day. I had built my entire social network around it. That's what Facebook wants you to do." Facebook's effort to purge its site of fake accounts, in the process knocking out some real people with unusual names, marks yet another challenge for the 5-year-old social network. '

WIRED
"Why Your Baby’s Name Will Sound Like Everyone Else’s"
Because they can only pronounce names beginning with ga-ga?

' Emma was the most popular baby girl name of 2008, the Social Security Administration announced today, supplanting Emily, which had held the slot for the past 12 years. Both names, though, reflect a much deeper and largely unnoticed naming trend, which has played out over decades. At the beginning of the last century, names beginning with vowels, like Amanda, dominated the name popularity charts. But slowly their usage fell, bottoming out in the middle of the century as the consonant names, like David or Donna, rose to prominence. Recently, the vowels have been creeping back up to dominance. '

THE MODERATE VOICE
"What’s in a Name? A Dutch Name, That Is."
Och, dem Hollanders! What a low country! A veritable neder-nederland!

' Prior to the Napoleonic era in Holland, family names were not legally required. As a result of the establishment of mandatory and official registration of births, marriages and deaths and for purposes of the census, taxation, conscription, etc., the Dutch who did not have “fixed surnames and given names” were required to adopt a fixed, permanent family name. Many patronymics did become permanent family names—such as today’s very common Peters, Jansen, Willems, Hansen, etc. Consistent with the Dutch independent mind, pragmatism, stubbornness, and yes, sense of humor, thousands upon thousands of Dutch did not take Napoleon seriously. Perhaps, they even wanted to rebel in their own way, or to mock Napoleon and his system—play a practical joke on the French occupiers. Additionally, they looked at this “name system” as a temporary law that would be repealed once Napoleon left Holland. So, they deliberately adopted and registered family names that are funny, ridiculous, confusing, and sometimes even lewd and offensive-sounding—many of the latter supposedly at the expense of Napoleon and the French occupiers.
Some examples are:
• Suikerbuik (Sugar belly)
• Spring in ‘t Veld (Jump in the Field)
• Uiekruier (Onion-crier)
• Naaktgeboren (Born naked)
• Poepjes (Little sh*t)
• Schooier (Beggar, bum, tramp)
• Scheefnek (Crooked-neck)
• Piest ([he] urinates)
• Zeldenthuis (Hardly ever at home)
• Rotmensen (Rotten people)
Also, De Keizer (The Emperor) —ostensibly to mock Napoleon himself. And my own family name, de Wind (the wind). The selection of weird and funny names may have been a joke that backfired. The civil registration system introduced by Napoleon has “stuck” to this day—and so have most of those silly, funny, strange Dutch family names.As a side note: My stepfather (a Dutchman) also has an interesting family name: Kortekaas, which means “short cheese.” '

THE STRAIGHT DOPE
"Is "squaw" an obscene insult?"
My squaw never thought so. Till the day she tomahawked me.

' Q: Here in Maine, the state legislature is taking up a bill to ban the use of the word squaw in place names. Native Americans contend that it is a vulgarity, meaning prostitute or c*** rather than woman. Was this a general word that was used in many languages, or was it specific to one or two? Are there any old Native American songs or poems that might use this word in a more ordinary sense, revealing that it is not as degrading as they might contend, or is it absent from N.A. literature, indicating that it is indeed vulgar? If it is found in the literature, are other "vulgar" words used as well?
A: One doesn't want to get overly PC about it, but the protesters have a point when they say special terms for minority women are inherently demeaning. Think about it. Negress. Jewess. Sixty years ago these terms were in common use. Now they make your flesh creep. Next picture some pot-bellied slob in a cowboy hat: "Why, if it ain't a injun and his squaw." In 1967, 143 place names containing the word nigger were changed to Negro by order of the U.S. Board on Geographic Names. Squaw Valley may not be in the same league as N*gger Lake on the offensiveness scale. But it's up there with Pickaninny Creek. '

WTOP NEWS, WASHINGTON DC
"Place names that make you snicker"
And then there's that tacky new development, Auschwitz Meadows.

' "No, seriously. Where do you live?" Imagine the hassle of living in a town or on a street with a name, such as Intercourse (Pennsylvania) or Beaver Lick (Kentucky). Well, many people in the area have probably endured a snicker or two or gotten tired of spelling the name over the phone. In Maryland, there are areas with names that include Scaggsville, Crapo and Boring. Virginia has Bumpass, Fourway, and Nuttsville. '

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NEWS FLASH

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SEEING COLORS

YOUTUBE
"indecent naked protest by long march supporter in pakistan"
Now THAT'S teabagging!



IS THAT A RAINBOW?

The End Of The World Is Always Near For The Fundamentalcases

LA TIMES
"Taliban militants edge closer to Pakistan capital"
God hates barber shops & girls' schools. And asparagus. Be afraid, asparagus. Be very afraid.

' The North-West Frontier Province dispatched a few hundred paramilitary forces today to the district of Buner, about 60 miles from Islamabad, after Taliban forces took control of much of the area this week. Most were believed to have remained inside government buildings without engaging the militants, although there were unconfirmed reports of one policeman dying in a gunfight. Taliban fighters from the nearby Swat Valley have infiltrated the area in recent days, emboldened by a government-sanctioned peace deal allowing them to enforce Sharia, or Islamic law, in the valley, a onetime tourist paradise. Prime Minister Yusaf Raza Gillani told reporters in Islamabad that the government would safeguard against any violation of the peace agreement reached in the Swat Valley. "The government will not allow anyone to challenge the government," he said in a statement. But in Buner, the Taliban remained largely in control despite today's stepped-up paramilitary presence. "We will not leave the area," a Taliban commander, Mufti Bashir, told local journalists. Since entering Buner from Swat, the Taliban has reportedly set up checkpoints, started patrolling roads and ordered barbershops to stop shaving beards, which are favored by Islamic militants. The moves have prompted some residents to flee. The Taliban's rule in Swat has been characterized by the burning of girls' schools, killing and beating of officials who opposed its rule, and punishment for unrelated men and women seen together in public. '

NASSAU NEWS LIVE
"Gov. Paterson Reverses Action to Pass Same-Sex Marriage Bill"
The sightless failing to lead the foresightless? The blind leading those with blinders? The feckless leading the witless?

' In his proposal last Thursday the governor called for immediate action. “For too long, LGBT New Yorkers have been told to wait for their civil rights and personal freedom. We will not wait any longer. Now is the time for action. Now is the time for leadership. Now is the time to march forward together,” Paterson is quoted saying in a press release. So why the sudden reverse? Governor Paterson explained to reporters, "On this particular bill, there are a lot of other issues related to it. Senator Smith knows the inertia of the Senate better than anyone else . . . I'll stick with his final judgment." '

POLITICO
"Credit companies brace for W.H. visit"
In other words, CHEEZIT, DA COPS!!!

' “Most of the banks realize that some of what they’ve done before — the processes being followed — don’t really look very good in the light of day,” said Sen. Tom Carper (D-Del.), whose state is home base for a large number of credit card firms. '

LIVE SCIENCE.COM
"Mind-Reading Device Sends Twitter Messages"
Unfortunately, most twits don't have minds. Not so you'd want to read them. Maybe thinking caps would help. If they could do the thinking.

' Earlier this month, Wilson thought of a tweet (the name for a post to the social networking site) and poof, his computer read his mind and sent the darn thing. At just 23 characters, Wilson's message, "using EEG to send tweet," was done with a computer setup that interprets brain waves. Other mind-reading devices have been developed recently. Other research has suggested brain activity could be monitored before decisions are made, perhaps with a mind-reading hat that would predict what we'll do. One shines near-infrared light into the noggin to glean thoughts. And some brain-computer interface systems employ an electrode-studded cap wired to a computer to detect electrical signals in the brain and translate them into physical actions, such as moving a cursor on a screen. '

YAHOO NEWS
"Pharmacy made mistake in horse drug"
Takes kind of a big "mistake" to kill a horse. But TWENTY-ONE horses???!!!

' An official at a Florida pharmacy said Thursday the business incorrectly prepared a supplement given to 21 polo horses that died over the weekend while preparing to play in a championship match. Jennifer Beckett of Franck's Pharmacy in Ocala, Fla., told The Associated Press in a statement that the business conducted an internal investigation that found "the strength of an ingredient in the medication was incorrect." The statement did not say what the ingredient was. '

BBC
"Cow genome 'to transform farming' "
Frankencows! Uber-rats! Improved monkeys! --Oh, wait, that's us...

' Cattle now join an elite group of animals to have had their genome sequenced - a group that includes humans, other primates and rodents. "We chose to study the cow genome because these animals are of such immense importance to humans," explained Richard Gibbs from Baylor College of Medicine's Human Genome Sequencing Center, a leading contributor to the project.By comparing the results to other sequenced genomes, including that of humans, the researchers discovered how cows could help inform research into human health and disease. "We found that cows are much more similar to us than rodents are," said Professor Gibbs. "This is because rodents are evolving much faster. And it tells us aspects of human biology that we could actually study in cows." '

REUTERS
"Scientists make super-strong metallic spider silk"
Mmmm, spider milk!

' Spider silk has long fascinated scientists but producing it in commercial quantities is difficult because spiders kept in captivity tend to eat each other. As a result, researchers have looked at alternative ways of producing silk without spiders, by duplicating their spinning technique. Approaches being tried include deriving fiber from the milk of transgenic goats with an extra spider-silk gene and adapting silk produced by other insects, such as silkworms. '

SPACE.COM
"Giant Mystery Blob Discovered Near Dawn of Time"
As long as it doesn't eat the diner. Or Tokyo.

' The cloud predates similar blobs, known as Lyman-Alpha blobs, which existed when the universe was 2 billion to 3 billion years old. Researchers named their new find Himiko, after an ancient Japanese queen with an equally murky past. Himiko holds more than 10 times as much mass as the next largest object found in the early universe, or roughly the equivalent mass of 40 billion suns. At 55,000 light years across, it spans about half the diameter of our Milky Way Galaxy. '

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TO POST A COMMENT: CLICK ON "COMMENTS," "Post a Comment" or "# of COMMENTS" just below the SOCIAL BOOKMARKING LINKS (Digg, Delicious, etc), about three inches down from here. Please do comment. Thank you.

IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM YOUR BLOGGERS:

Suggestion Box & Tip Jar We would like to make over this blog to make it easier to access, to read and to comment on. We would also like to serve our readers better by providing more of what you need and want to see. All serious suggestions will be considered. We hope to move to our own domain in the near future, and we would like to ask for your financial assistance in doing that, and in upgrading our hardware & software. Small one-time donations and larger long-term subscriptions are welcome. Exclusive advertising is also available. If you think we are wasting our time in doing all this, please let us know. If you wish to help us, now is the time. As always, negative bullsh*t from right-wing trolls will be sh*tcanned. Thank you to everyone else. Please send feedback & PayPal contributions to cosanostradamusATexciteDOTcom. Thanks.

SUPPORT OUR TROOPS: BRING THEM ALL HOME ALIVE, NOW!